Beth's Story


Issues such as healing-in-the-now bring varied responses. Everyone’s journey is different. We’ve all heard some wonderful stories and a few disasters. But it does seem that God responds to sheer desperation.
My friend Beth testifies of an unusual God whisper, perhaps a key to real faith for some. It was for me at one stage too.

In 1986, in her thirties and early in her pregnancy with her third child, Beth was diagnosed with cervical cancer. Her doctor wanted to operate straight away, which would mean aborting the baby. Beth was adamant that would not happen.

She confided in a couple from church and they met each Monday night to pray. One prayer was always, Let the cancer stop growing.

The doctor monitored Beth carefully over the weeks, and took a biopsy every two months. He shook his head each time, amazed. The ‘rapid growing’ cancer was not growing.

The baby, Heidi, arrived two weeks overdue. The operation was not scheduled until Heidi was ten weeks old.

Beth longed for God to heal her rather than have the operation. One day, pacing the floor as she prayed, begging Him to heal her, she heard Him say, ‘Do you really want me to heal you?’ Beth was perplexed, frustrated and even annoyed. ‘You know I do!’ she retorted. ‘It is my first preference that You Yourself heal me.’

Days later she had the operation removing the cancer.
Over the years she pondered God’s question. He knew she had wanted Him to heal her Himself. I remember her telling me over lunch, ‘I just wanted my heavenly Daddy to heal me.’ Large tears rolled down her face.

One afternoon He whispered to her, ‘You weren’t desperate enough.’

That was a revelation to Beth although she didn’t fully understand it.

When she told the story of her cancer again recently, as she said ‘that’s my first preference’, God nudged her spirit in conviction. ‘That’s why I didn’t heal you. You had a backup plan, a second preference. That’s not being desperate. It’s not real faith.’

Fortunately for all of us, God is patient while our faith grows. For most of us it is a journey, with whispers along the way.

So that was Beth’s story. She did receive a miracle: the cancer did not grow.   Her story resonated with me. I’ve had moments of desperation in my own life, and experienced God’s intervention. (One was related in my story in Stories of life 2016, When I Think I’m Going Under – in the anthology, A Chicken can make a Difference).

I’m thankful for the journey – and the whispers.

By the way, several years ago I attended Heidi’s wedding. Heidi, the girl they wanted to abort.
She was a beautiful bride.

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